Tuesday, 14 August 2012

So You Think You Can...MARRY

I really don't know how to put all my thoughts into writing at the moment but I will try my best to shed some light on this issue.
In the beginning, there was sex...
Adam and Eve got married in the garden of Eden with God being the witness, best man and even best lady. He created Adam from the soil and Eve from and for Adam. So before, we talk about sex let's first talk about the perfect marriage
The Perfect Marriage
It is over confidence, because God's grace is sufficient!
By perfect marriage, I don't mean, the marriage without challenges. I'm referring to the marriage preordained by God. Stamped and posted by the most Ultimate. God made Eve for Adam because he was alone and needed a partner. Adam was the alpha male then, he had a job, he was the boss, had a home and was ready to have a partner. So as a woman, you cannot just settle for anybody without  first seeking God's consent and approval. 'God, is this my Adam or Eve?' I have written a post about some basic steps to take before saying 'I do' check here but I didn't really hit the 'nails' on the head then.
Please and please I beg you, you have to be perfectly sure about your future partner before you take the huge step of marriage. Pray and fast, then pray and fast again until you are sure. Meet with your pastor, or mentor to seek for guidance and counselling. Ask yourself these questions:

  • Do I want to get married?
  • Am I ready to get married?
  • Do I love him/her?
  • Is God saying yes?
  • Do my people love him/her?
  • Am I ready to be selfless?
  • Can I take care of a  home?
  • Am I sure or is this a 'maybe'?
If you can answer a good resounding YES and AMEN to all of the above then you're good to go, if not then take some chill pills because you're not ready mister. You are 34 doesn't mean you're mature enough to handle the duress of marriage. Nopes miss, no!
Correct me if I'm wrong but I don't believe you have to know your partner well enough before you get married. Even if you date for ten years, there will still be some hidden traits patiently waiting to erupt in your marital home, so forget the knowing your partner well enough-ish! Adam didn't have to court Eve or 'know her well enough' before he said:  'at last here is my own kind-bone taken from my bone, and flesh from my flesh-Gen2:23. Do you want to know why? Because God was involved. Eve was given to Adam by God. He trusted God and married Eve immediately. Adam didn't say, 'but chill oh! i just met her nah...what if she snores, or she can't 'perform' well (please take note of this part very well because I will be coming back to it in the sex talk). No doubt, Baba God you try oh, the babe set wella but let me study her first ehn biko'.
So what am I saying?! I'm s-a-y-i-n-g all you need for a perfect marriage is a perfect assurance from beyond so if or when your spouse starts messing up you can confidently go on your knees and demand from God to make things right because He told you he/she was yours! 
Devil wants imperfect marriages because a perfect one scares him and I'm sure divorces gives him orgasms! Don't give the devil a chance because you are desperate, because the dude is extra romantic and rich, or because the babe is a perfect size 10 with bootey like that of beyonce's and bosom like Ronke Oshodi Oke! Give God a chance and involve him now now with immediate alacrity, let Him give you  a partner that would help you implement your dreams and make you smile without much ado. 
Does your spouse to be drink or smoke? Clubs or party like there's no tomorrow? Sees no wrong in premarital sex? A Sunday Sunday tonic church goer? Watches porn videos like he's being paid to do it? Facebooks and tweets like there it's going out of vogue? Or chill sef, maybe both of you actually go to these clubs together, dance to the latest lady Gaga's single then quickly go to a dark corner and have a quickie...? If you answered yes to all of these and you see no wrong in them, hehehe*wipes tears from eyes* I laugh hysterically in Zulu!  Good luck to you but when cheating stories starts kindly keep them to yourself. Thank you *rme* 
Sorry folks but there's little or no remedy or solution to cheating spouses, because you probably married the wrong partner in the first instance. The only solution sadly is divorce, or keep exercising patience while praying. If you cheat in return you are only inviting more curses to your home and for God's sake pity your children because they would also share in them. So it's better you avoid it than regret it later. But remember to get the right partner, you have to be the right partner yourself. Work on yourself, read books, read your bible and most importantly PRAY!

To be Continued...